Got up to 32degrees F this morning. Had to be out the door by 8:30 to make a 9:30 appt. for shoe order. As it was I arrived about 10 minutes early if car clock is right now. I keep forgetting to check that. No matter, have learned I take longer to get masked up, get walker out and start in.  Well this morning I did. I had wanted to try my cane but my balance was horrible this morning. Could it have been from taking a pain pill before I left?

As I got in I was told the Dr. would be seeing me too. Why?  He just trimmed my nails already this month. Perhaps my questions about neuropathy in my feet had him thinking. He did that tone test which I really didn't pass. He should have a person shut their eyes while doing it. Then he rotated my ankles and feet, which work fine. It's when I stand up with my body weight that the balance issue comes to play. Rena saw it as she helped me walk in a pair of shoes, one larger than the other, one brown, one black. I should of taken a picture of that. LOL  Will be interesting when the shoes come in as she had put lifts in the ones I had on. No tennis shoes for me this time. Mine feel so heavy on my feet now.

Left there and headed for the feed store and got a bag of scratch and one of black oil sunflower seed. I stopped at the card rack and got some cards. I sent a thank you card to Millie after she set our tree up, she didn't get it. The post office sent an email out to let us know the pandemic has taken a toll on them along with holiday mail, but they are doing their best they said. They didn't remind us the new boss had removed needed equipment and cut over time.  I hope Pres elect Biden removes him. If he can.

I've had to rest a lot since I got home as my back continues to fuss. Don't plan on another pill until bedtime even though my Dr. said I could take one at dinner time if I needed it. I think that driving does aggravate it too. Of course podiatrist continues to tell me how much cheaper it would be to take Uber or Lift. After my stroke I had to depend on companies that offered rides. It is no fun as you sit and wait to be picked up in the cold. Or heat here. I know that day is coming when I'll have to sell the little PT and then won't be able to go get a couple donuts now and again. Plus I do have a couple prescription that I get from a local pharmacy drive thru.

While telling Wil that he reminded me I won't let him help drive. Whoops, a conversation I should not have shared with him.  He gave me his car key after that time he moved the car while I was in getting groceries. I can't tell him his reflexes weren't so good plus me having to tell him how to get where we were going.

Mr. Grey continues to come for feeding and petting. Tonight I tried to hand feed him some treats. They are really to small and I ended up just dropping them in front of him. He did take one and raised his foot like he wanted to smack another out of my fingers but didn't.  I've had my hand in his food dish pushing food off the edge but handing it to him is entirely different. He rubs against my legs as I sit to pet him and tonight stood up with his feet on my knees wanting the treat. Problem there he had his claws out. I am wearing slacks so he didn't hurt me.  If only I could trap him. I have to constantly remember he is not vaccinated.  Daughter saw him last night using the neighbors yard as a litter box. Well strays have to go some where and their yards are far from pristine. He probably uses ours some where as well.

Wil looks out the door for him and comes to tell me when he is there. Today he called him the grey cat instead of black. He will say "your friend is here". So it was funny when Millie came yesterday I thought he meant the cat. lol

Yesterday carried the printer in to Tim, his worker never told him I called. Let me clarify, Wil put it in the car and Tim went out and got it. I can't even lift it. Tim said he can order me some cheaper ink cartridges than what the office place has. That will save me some $.

Daughter is working with  me as bill paying online is fine with lights and water but a couple others have skitzy web pages. Shoot yesterday I messed up trying to get into FB on my cell and she had to come and deactivate a new account, uninstall the app and redo it. I don't get this app stuff either.

Got some email to take care of. Thanks for stopping by.

Rain was supposed to be here, then sun and wind. No rain at our house and so far no wind. So our flags weren't put out this morning. Groceries came so I missed the end of service. I'll just watch it online form church page some time this week. Can't print out any messages, old printer ran out of ink and I don't want to pay an outrages amount of money as it takes two cartridge's. I will donate the printer to Tim when I buy a new one from him that prints only black.  I don't need color now as I don't type Christmas newsletters.

This week promises to be busy. Carissa to come over in the morning, her visit should scare Mr. Grey off the porch. I will hand her the set trap with some tuna fish as bait and then we wait. I'll feed him less tonight so he will be really hungry. Cross our fingers it works on the first try. When/if he goes in and steps on the trigger, I've seen cats step over. I will have her put it in the car as it will be quiet and warmer there and then it is a drive to the vet. I didn't ask if I need to wait in the car due to pandemic. Probably do as they have a small waiting room.

Then Wednesday I make up the missed dental cleaning. She said she would not charge me and I'm thankful for that. Thursday morning is a trip to podiatrist to measure for shoes. I don't know what day vet will call for me to pick up cat as it depends when they get around to his surgery.  I can't bring him home same day as he has to be inside a day or two so I will pay boarding. A friend told me I could tame him easier if he was inside some where but I'd have to get a litter pan and keep him in the garage and have no way to assure Wil wouldn't let him out.  With all the trauma he is going to go through it will take a long time for me to build trust again.

I got kicked out of the Adults who love to Color FB group, right about the time I was thinking of leaving them any way. I've no idea what I did but I suspect when I ask one poster what medium she used and told her I got in trouble for not posting that information.  So many in that group were breaking rules but I make one mistake, I'm banned.

Funny as we age how we look at things we have differently.  I had a big mayonnaise glass jar half full of rocks I've collected under this desk. Tina and her wicked broom hit it and she said it was already broken. It may have had a crack but the huge hole was not there. She said the piece that fell out was small. Well someone tell me how did the hole get huge and no more pieces?  I gingerly took the top off and reached in for the rocks. I got Wil's help bagging the jar in an empty feed bag. Out to the trash it went. I will have to remind Tina not to dump glass in the regular trash. If I don't know it is there and go looking for anything I could get cut.  So I thought about this and decided rocks belong outside. That is where they went with only a couple put in a basket of rocks I have too. lol

Our windows have been hard to open, so I sprayed some WS40 on some tracks. That made a problem when I went to close one here in the office the other night. It hit an insulator on the windowsill sending it to the floor. Couldn't glue it back together so the biggest piece I put outside with the other broken ones, the small pieces are in that feed bag the above jar is.  I didn't cry just like I didn't cry when the shelf went down. Just one less insulator for daughter to get rid of when I die.  Just stating facts.

Last week for a couple or three days I would cry at the drop of a hat. Why? Who knows. Isolation? maybe. Doubtful as I can drive to the donut shop. lol

I discovered the other day what I thought was a problem with my shoes, is not. While Millie put our tree up I took my shoes off as my balance was horrible. I walked around in stocking feet, balance still bad.  Took about another day before I pinned it down to diabetic peripheral neuropathy. I asked the podiatrist, he had no comment. Instead he showed me how to stand on one foot at a time to regain balance.  1. I tried that long before I had the stroke...2. it isn't going to work.  I was going to order some slippers from them until I learned they are $60. I am real hard on slippers, I end up walking outside in them.

Well as far as that header goes I've had better days. Memory is getting worse, emotions the last couple days go from weepy to ticked at something. Kind of like the weather sunny or cold. I try to live by a routine, Wil jogged it off last night, refused to shower.  He spent the entire day doing nothing but watching TV, looking out a window or door for what he calls a black cat. Mr. Gray is pretty dark so that is understandable but why the sam hill do I correct him?  Probably one of the moods I'm in at the time.  I had planned for this week to trap him and get him vaccinated and neutered. Daughter has other ideas and insists next week when she is off it will be done.

I do understand she is trying to save me from back pain as I've had a lot of it of late. So tonight I plan on showing her how that old trap works and what I think should be done. Mr. Grey has breakfast promptly at 7 a.m.  If she arrives at the hour he is going to run to the bush and may stay there if she sets the trap on the porch.  I will have to stay out of sight and sound.  He sleeps in the box on the porch under the chair. He sees me the minute I put the window blind up in the office. I will have to remember not to do that.

If he goes in the trap fairly soon and eats that tuna I will have her put the trap in the back of my car as it will be warmer in there. Vet doesn't open until 8 a.m.  My luck of late the little bugger will wait until 6 p.m. when the vet is closed. I'm afraid if I don't get him on the first try there won't be a second.  Sometimes cats will step right over the trigger.

I will ask them to chip him so if Animal Care pics him up he can be identified.  He will have to be an outdoor cat until he gets a lot more tame. He lets me pet him but any wrong move I may get slapped with his paw. I stepped to close to him the other day, he got my leg.

Carissa drove me yesterday to Costco to get my hearing aids cleaned. Crowded, she let me out told me to call her while she sat in the car. I did that, she didn't answer her phone it went to voice mail. After so many tries I got worried. I asked a young employee if he sees a PT Cruiser tell her I'm ready for pick up.  It was cold, I only had a sweater on, but I tried another employee to ask were lot security was. He was pushing carts and couldn't be any help other than go in there pointing and ask for a supervisor.  Did that and could feel tears. I sat outside on the edge of a pole and Chase stopped to help again. By then I was crying. Supervisor showed up, looked at my phone for her number and Chase kept telling me he would stay right with me. He soon saw the car and stood in the road waving for her.  He put my walker in the car and I wasn't even thinking of looking for a tip. Turns out the volume on her phone must of been turned down. We picked up subs on the way home.  Even now writing about this I have tears in my eyes.  WTH??  Shoot I cried through part of church today.

Oh and Wil showered and shaved today. and watched the cat.

Yesterday we had some drizzle. Today is heavy drizzle. lol  I went out at 6 a.m. to see if I could see where Mr. Grey might be. He came flying out of the crate by the garage door, set up for him for winter.  I called him and he came back and followed me to the front  porch where he eats.  It was a bit nippy so I didn't set long and talked to him.  Eventually I put a refill and sat down. He didn't eat much and I knew he wasn't hungry. I reached down to pet him and he let me.  He even came over and laid down with his head on my shoe. I continued to talk to him while petting him.  Finally I must of moved my foot or something and he backed up and swatted my hand.  End of this session, I came back in the house...dirty hand with cat hairs. lol

I figure by spring I might be able to handle him enough to get to a vet for neuter and vaccination.  I can't let him in the garage for winter as it is just as cold in there and I've no idea how I would get him to the garage. Besides he has fleas I'm sure.  I'd have to get a litter pan and I'd have to leave the door open to outside too. Wouldn't want to do that when going to bed.  We have possums and skunks around here. lol

Wil watches him and lets me know when I'm back here in the office that he is on the porch. He thinks the cat is black, that is how dark a grey he is. I wish this city never allowed cats to roam.

Our Thanksgiving was pork. Daughter doesn't like ham and we can no longer eat a turkey and find room in the freezer. With me having no taste to speak of it just would be too much work. Wil would only eat the breast as would daughter. Carissa bought a banana with nuts loaf for her and I, Wil won't eat nuts, so she got a fruit loaf for him. I could not taste the banana's in the loaf. I did taste my sweet  potato , I'm the only one that eats that. I did taste the cranberries.

I was struggling with pain so daughter did the dishes. She had asked Wil if he wanted to dry, he stayed in front of the TV. Yesterday when I asked him if he wanted to do the few dishes in the pan he said he did them yesterday. So I guess his days at the sink are only to fuss with any crumbs on the counter and move the peanut butter jar to the edge of the counter.  That's the kind of thing he does now.  Some days I can get him to fill bird baths and the other night he did fold his u.wear. Which is good as I can't fold his t shirts right. He mostly sleeps. Doc told me he would do that.

I'm still doing the coloring stuff and post them on FB and sometimes into the Adults who like to Color group. Gotta go drag the Christmas card box down and see who I will send to this year. Gets fewer every year. Some I do online.

It was Tues. last week I got my injection. Wednesday Tina came to do the floors and put fresh sheets on the bed.  She got wound up as the Hackberry gnats that were all over the windowsill were falling on the bed.  I got some spray, the only kind I had and that left dead gnats. So off I went for a wet sponge. Would of helped if she wiped them up as that had me stretching.  This is a winter time occurrence and she even has them at her house.

Thursday I went out to bring the blue recycle bin in and decided while out back I was grab the hose and spray those back windows. I was not wearing my pendant and when I went to step off the blocks with the hose in hand my heel slipped in the shoe sending me to the ground!  So while laying on the ground I slung the hose as far away as I could hoping it wouldn't whirl around and douse me.  I managed to get on my hands and knees and push myself up.  So here I am 4 days later with muscles that don't like me and a skinned knee.

I can't even wear my slippers as my foot moves to much in it.  I managed to stub the big toe on the solid wood edge of a cabinet by Wil's desk, Friday. That sent the most horrible pain straight up my leg into that troublesome buttock.  At least by today I have cut pain medicine way down. Once at 7:30 this  morning.

Walking is still very difficult and Janice brought us a baked chicken for supper last night. Wil didn't touch the most delicious carrots the only thing I could really taste. Mr. Grey got some of the skin last night too. She brought and apple pie for us too. By 9 p.m. Wil complete forgot he had a large piece of pie and sulked when I told him no more I was saving some for Carissa today. Then I put it out of sight.

Dreaded shower time came and I explained to Wil how to get the water as last week he didn't remember. He picked up my wash cloth that had fallen to the floor and used it. After he dries he put the floor mat up on the shower rods. I can't get him to quit that as the one rod will come down and I can't reach to get it up. So I fixed his towel and the mat where it goes. When I asked if he was going to shave or wait until this morning he was determined he had recently shaved. I let it go and hoped this morning he would shave and he did.

This week I need to get him for a hair cut but since I'm not really able to walk that may get postponed until my leg heals.  I had a hard enough time making taco soup today and getting dishes done. I'm actually sitting on the heating pad which is really a no no.

 Worked on this last night.  Prisma pencil for the flowers. Trying to learn to use them.

I should be used to pain by now but I'm so tired of it! When I post on FB I'm in pain is there any offers to help? No instead I get likes! Yes I know that simply means they read the post.

Got up late, 6 a.m. and when I got to the window in the birds room and put the shade up and opened the window there was Mr. Grey.

He is feral, comes close to feed, but if I move he backs up. Way up often. I have a chair on the porch and I have to sit to feed him and get the plate down.  I talk to him while he eats and this morning as he pushed food off the plate he did not run when I reached to put it back.

He comes right up to the door and looks in as I go out. I'm glad he doesn't run in as I can't touch him so I wouldn't be able to pick him up unless I tossed a towel over him.

I've made a crate with straw in it over by the garage door so for winter he can go in.  Yes skunks or possums might end up in it. I don't care if Mr. Grey isn't using it.

I miss having no pet but it is OK I really have to much trouble with my back and legs to have one, plus Wil needs care. Yesterday I was so busy unpacking his new jeans I didn't over see his pill taking and he didn't get up until noon so I was making sure he ate his breakfast.  I hurt to much to worry about lunch, I threw a sandwich together for me as he had his cereal and coffee.  Some days I wish we had Meals On Wheels but we don't qualify as I have a car. Plus we used to deliver those and so much they have he would not eat. Anything in the squash family is out for him.  I used to buy squash and Pookie and I could share it.  He ate his mom's pumpkin pie but hated it.

Last week I got to see Dr. Martinez pain management instead of the nurse practioner.  Or was that week before last? lol  Now I forgot what he said the CT scan showed other than the severe something or other in my back that I've had. I was near tears as I asked if he felt like my primary that I just have to learn to live with it. Though primary doc was talking about esophagus problem. He had no idea why ablation failed or if my fall rescuing pups on the last one may have had a cause.  He wants to use the steriod again to maybe get a handle on this inflammation. So this week we will do that. Of course Doc took this week off so someone I have never even seen in the practice will do it.  He wants me to consider the placenta injection that has been around many years.

The only problem with injections is having to have a driver. Wil no longer drives, my choice.

I have to try everything, I need to be able to walk without the pain waist down. Bad enough I will have the esophagus problem and now the right shoulder and this week I've been waking with pain in my hands. ?? arthritis I suppose. People just stare at me when I have said I am not interested in living to 90. I wish only to take care of Wil and if he goes I would like to follow.

Depressed? I guess.

Last night I wanted to buy a face mask that had only elastic not adjustable for over the ears.  I had to struggle with their confusing way to sign the form. I finally figured it out (unlike other forms) and when I put my credit card in I got insufficient funds. What! A call to Visa, listened to available cash etc. Well that didn't make sense. So today I tried a different company that takes pay through pay pal. Oh my gosh I got denied!  After a trip through Visa menu I got a human.  Turns out my last payment was in Sept. on the card. The bills go to daughters mail box. So paid the late fee and $29 to basically unlock my account. I think she said they would issue another bill.  In the process I set up my account online so I can just pay through there. I do need to go back in and make sure I am not set up auto pay. I'll do that tomorrow.

Daughter said she gave me a bill, but I hate to tell her that was Spectrum and I had paid it. I searched all over my desk, found no bill from Visa.  I hope I find a way Visa sends email notices like the utilities do. So the idea of sending bills to her so Wil didn't get a hold of them is not going to work. Of course I sent a short IM to her on FB and she was in a meeting. Sorry about that but I was really upset. I thought someone was using my card.

The only other time I was late on a bill was when I had my stroke and Wil had put the mail in the glove box as he went some where and of course he forgot it was in there. Tax notice was in there too.

So while the lady said I could go ahead and get my mask I'm not going too. I can't charge daughter the late fee as she spends enough on us when she gets groceries. She will never give me the amount so I've just started handing her cash. She gets her groceries at the same time.  I'm trying to get most of mine through Wal Mart delivery but I always forget something.

Well it is now dark and I didn't hear Wil come in from filling bird baths. Gotta git.

We had a period of chilly weather and I could turn off the air conditioner and open windows. Of course that didn't last and with no rain we are back to stage 1 drought condition. I haven't been watering lawn for a long time any way.

Got up at 5 a.m. this morning so by 10 a.m. I fell asleep watching tv. I had put the towels in the washer, which reminds me time out to check the dryer. I did have pain med at midnight so that could account for falling asleep.  I did manage to heat up leftovers for lunch. Once fully awake I put the dishes to soak and and headed to the Credit Union for some cash. This is the first time I ran out and don't really know why. $30 for cake $60 to remove shrub, $35 for Tina doing floors, $60 for grass cut, other wise where did it go? Only put gas in the car twice.  So now I need to draw up another document on the computer. I've money on the credit card going out for medicine, that isn't included.

Wil and I went down to wash the car this afternoon. I carried rags to dry the windows when done. I need to instruct the grey cat not to get up on the car and leave footprints any more. lol

The political situation in this country has me really depressed. I won't go back to a group I was in because they think the covid virus is exaggerated by the media, tell that to the families of the sick and deceased. They don't approve of statins, which I take to control cholesterol. They are supporters of the president and see no wrong he has done, is doing.  The list goes on. I've known the owner of the group for years but I've just reached that time where enough is enough.

Wednesday Kate will take Wil and I to the ophthalmologist. We will have our eyes dilated and I have never driven after that plus since the stroke I haven't driven that far. I don't even get to the cemetery now.  I suppose he will tell me it is time to do something about Wil's cataracts and Carissa and I don't think it is a good idea. He doesn't drive any more. I should pray about that.

Thoughts just left me. Yeah I'm sleepy again.

I've been spending time putting photo's of our 50th wedding anniv. party on FaceBook from 10 yrs. ago. Won't be a celebration in a venue this year.  As I was going threw (wrong spelling I think) them I was faced with those who came who have since passed away.  Sobering.

I have ordered a cake from the church treasurer. Her other job. I've seen her work posted every so often on the church page. Carissa wants to get food from Olive Garden. She works the 15th. I will dress better and get Wil to do so plus put his teeth in. I know she will take a picture.

Even if we could of gone out Wil doesn't like a lot of commotion around him. Loud noises also startle him. I laughed to loud the other day and he got upset grabbing his ears. Yet so much of the time he can't hear what I'm saying. ?? He has always had a softer voice than mine but now he mumbles making it hard for me to hear him.  So much of the time either one of us can be searching for a word. That I know is an aging thing. I will be 81 Sunday. Wil remembers nothing about our wedding.  But at least he knows me as well as Carissa.

 Our happy day. I ought to go get some milkshakes from Dairy Queen because we did that after visiting my Grandmother in the hospital. Following our reception so he was still in uniform, me in wedding gown.

I love this man so much, for better or worse.

Woke up coughing like heck, blurry eyes and barely able to move. Mornings are now miserable but I got to stay in bed until 5 a.m.  First thing I do in the kitchen is set up the coffee pot for Wil, set out his cereal, bowl and spoon. Then I get breakfast.  Then I set up the big purse for the pain management visit today.

Beautiful day, drove car windows open. Concerned with my memory as I headed onto the loop. This is the third time I had to think what exit I needed. We hadn't seen our primary for 3 months and this is a 4 month trip but they both require the same exit and I have to pull it out of memory. Yesterday when I needed to take the car to the body shop for the trim same problem. Scares me. No I have not mentioned that to daughter. She has enough to worry about. A lot of construction is going on side roads and they have these concrete barriers up and I wonder if that could be the problem. Doubt it but they do obscure landmarks.

I got there only to find out some idiot going out made me have to cut my wheels enough a back tire went over the curb. I could not stop on a main thoroughfare and wait for him to go out. He was to far over for me to get in easily, but I did. Only to find out my appt. is tomorrow!  Geesh. Ok I admit it my brain isn't always on the job.

I told Wil as I was leaving I would pick up lunch on the way home and bless his heart he pulled $10 from his wallet, said it was his turn to pay. I guess his brain isn't working that money I have is really his drawn from the bank account. I stupidly told him that, no thinking again.

After a nap I tried to color a bit to see if I could get the orange pen to work. I couldn't. But while coloring I was thinking about Dee Churchill, the old Coffee bean Goddess whose page is finally gone so now I can't go back. I think Doug's is also gone. Two old friends some of you probably knew.

This weather I always remember my visit with Dee in Langlois, Oregon. I don't even remember the date I went. She died I think the month before Scott. It was such a shock when her brother left the news in the comments in her blog.  There are still a lot of blog writers at work. Read a few today.  I still need to clean out bookmarks though.  Finally found my link for posting on my 'Transplant to Texas' blog, not that I'll try to write over there. No one reads it. It's Word Press I think. lol  Shoot I really have little to write about.

I don't keep up with all my Paint Shop Pro groups either. Quit going to one when the owner told us what a great guy the Pres. is.  Staying away from another group until after the election, then maybe I'll pop in. FB is hard enough.  Old Hat and daughter are over there along with my relatives. I quit reading Wil's family over there. I can only take so much of pictures of babies. lol His own niece doesn't keep us posted on her mother, she moved to Florida so I doubt she knows what is going on with her mother now.  I'm not sure Wil even remembers his sister.

I'm rambling, I'm going. Thanks for popping in and no I don't know if I will watch the debate tonight. I already have my mind made up.