July 31, 2022
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Sunny Sunday, of course
Wil was getting his shoes on to go fill bird baths out back while I was pulling Monday trash bin to the front yard. By the time I got back in I didn't see him and came back to the office. Shortly after my alarm alerts back door open. I hollered I'm back here. Heard it open again. Now the cats are in the garage in the afternoon so I got out to see what he was doing. He apparently didn't know why he was out there so no water in bird baths. I told him to go watch TV I didn't want cats out. So he is.
The day has been better than yesterday when my coccyx would not let me sit. Walking is still painful though. That is the day was better until the phone rang. A friend of Evelyn's I guess. Evelyn is the woman that assists Wil with shower and shave and works sometimes the Respite Care spot. I also pay her on her day off to do my floors and make that bed.
This stranger has a large room we could move in to. What the heck! Evelyn was here the day May brought me home crying after a doctor's appt. She knew it was because May told me we needed to go into assisted living. She heard me ranting about it. She heard me say NO way. Why would she talk to this lady about this? I'll have to ask her Wednesday, this is not a matter for a phone call.
I know people are concerned because my health is not the best and we have no family now. Just how do they think I could liquidate this 3 bedroom home by myself? I'm not able to drive far now so how would I find a place? I will not give up the cats, they are comfort to me and the little feral loves curtains. Working on her about furniture now.
These facilities start at $3500 a month, add your tv, internet, phone and anything else you need. If Wil's dementia went down hill and he did not adapt I would be paying two places as I sat alone in assisted living.
Wil is fed, his clothes cleaned, his medications dispensed and for the most part he seems happy. He still picks on me when others are around. It is hard to communicate with him as he can't hear even if I manage to get him to put the one hearing aid in. His quiet voice has become so soft you can hardly hear him and the dementia has taken words out of his mouth as he tries to communicate some times.
I wear my pendant on getting up and until bedtime. The new one in by the bathtub would allow Brinks to open the front door for help should I fall. Yes I still fall when least expected, once this month. I'm using my walker more in the house than I was. At night bathroom trips are still wall walking. lol I do know this house is so full of furniture a wheel chair would be impossible. With the torn rotator cuff I doubt I could use one any way.
It isn't that I've not given things a thought. May said when Wil dies she just knows I'll stay here. So why the hell bring it up?
Comments (7)
Mary Wil's disability was his hearing 10 % and to even get that kind of VA help disability has to be 70%. The VA is now supplying Respite care so I can go do Dr. while someone is with him. He is also getting shower shave assist twice weekly.
Good Afternoon Bonnie,
9Sounds like you've got lots on your shoulders lately. Have u checked to see what VA will pay for if Will needs to go into a nursing home? Hubby's Uncle was a Vet and his dementia got super bad and wife had to put him in a nursing home that specialized in this kind of care. The VA paid most of the monthly bill. Was a big load off her shoulders. U stay put till you can no longer take care of yourself, then decide. I sure do miss you and worry when weeks go by and you don't post an entry. I'm here in the background just not leaving a messages, but I'm here. Please never give up your writing, I look so forward to it. You'd be surprised how much our lives are alike. Your one strong lady and a true inspiration Hugs
Rosemary that was the plan of daughter and I. Unfortunately I don't have her for back up now. Be easier if I had a lot of confidence in myself.
Sounds like you have given thought as to what to do Bonnie - as long as you can stay in your house the better for you and Wil. My only advice is get any and all the help you need with things whether provided free or you have to pay for it. Take care.
@BLB: Yes, take care, Bonnie .
@fauquet: thank you Michel. Amazing how some people try to 'boss' you around.
You're right to distrust advisers, Bonnie. Your house has no floors so it is well suited for you and your walker. Both stay at home and maintain your independence as much as possible.
Love
Michel
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